It’s Been a Little Quiet…
I wish I could say that a quiet few weeks meant that I was enjoying summer vacation time with my family or spending time with friends. Instead, after 2.5 years, I contracted COVID and it took me and my stepson out for a few days. Pile that on with current events, and I’ve had a lot of time to reflect in the past two weeks.
My COVID Experience
Before I talk about languishing with COVID for ten days, I want to point out that I’m grateful for my privilege. I work for a company (full-time role) that has generous sick time and offered me flexibility to take care of myself and family. I appreciate my patient clients who were able to shift a few deadlines so I could play catch up. I’m vaccinated and that happy vaccines were incredibly easy to get and recover from. Thanks to my spouse’s excellent insurance, I had access to an immediate telehealth visit and a prescription to Plaxlovid.
Saying these statements isn’t about bragging, but more about the recognition that our collective, working society frowns upon down time whether for leisure or necessity. In our deeply connected world, it’s nearly impossible to take proper time away. We all have access to personal cell phone numbers and are all guilty of, “I hate to bother you while you are on vacation, but I have a quick question.” I’ve done that and I’ve received those texts!
I love to work, sometimes to a fault. I was babysitting at age 11, had my first summer job at 15, worked in restaurants while concurrently going to school or working a full-time job for 20 years, and was crazy enough to start up a consulting business when I left full-time museum work - because I was scared of being too bored with a 40-hour workweek. In the midst of my COVID experience, my stepson also tested positive. I asked my spouse to stay away from the house and even though I was recovering, I was also caretaking. As I felt better and resumed work for my full-time role, I found myself camped out at my dining room table with an antsy and bored 12-year-old who demanded my attention. I found myself emotionally thrown back to March and April 2020 while trying to balance my self-inflicted work expectations with the immediate needs of my family. People often ask why I enjoy going into the office and why I maintain a coworking space membership - this past week has reminded why.
I love my stepson very much, but I don’t enjoy the mix of on-demand parenting while being a professional.
COVID and Current Events
In between zoning out with Married at First Site on Netflix and rewatching seasons one and two of Grey’s Anatomy, the amount of downtime I had mixed with the state of current events was an emotionally difficult mix. If you were an early Grey’s fan, you might remember Cristina Yang’s pregnancy as a young intern at Seattle Grace. Episode after episode included her abortion storyline until the episode where abortion saved her life. It was like being gut punched to watch a fictional storyline play out and to think, “for millions of women, this is no longer an option.”
This also took me down the mental rabbit hole in thinking of my own privilege. I live in a place where I do have medical decision-making in place as well as paid maternity and sick leave mandates. There are social supports in place. They may not be perfect and all-encompassing, but it’s more than other places that are now forcing women into poverty and death.
How does this tie into museum work and consulting? I spent a lot of time thinking about my early career days in the field. If I got pregnant in my late 20s or early 30s, it would have been impossible with the salaries I earned to have a baby. My graduate school education, considered mandatory for being being hired, cost almost as much as my housing expenses. There were months where I had to decide on paying bills or having groceries. I worked an additional 8-15 hours/week as a bartender to supplement my museum income. I don’t know how I would have been able to give a child a proper upbringing.
Thanks to gun violence, I also had time to think about Jayland Walker and the families who had their lives uprooted in the Highland Park parade shooting. I’m not a police officer and don’t want to play an armchair role, but why was it necessary to shoot at or shoot Walker so many times; and why was the Highland Park shooter taken into custody in a relatively peaceful fashion? I also think about the story of the two-year child that lost both parents at a Fourth of July parade and the injustice of people to call themselves pro-life while not fighting for reasonable gun legislation.
It’s Been a Little Quiet
Besides lingering exhaustion, I’m recovered from my bout with COVID and can say with confidence that I don’t want to get this again. As for my emotional health, it’s been a long few weeks and I know I’m not alone in the anguish. My hope for my fellow museum and nonprofit colleagues is that you can find a way to disconnect, even for a short time, from the news, from your jobs, and from anything that requires a break. Give yourself some grace and kindness - because we’re all living through a lot right now.